You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
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So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
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I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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