I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Your cock deserves a montage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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