her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
my god I love twenty year old dicks
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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