I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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