you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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