I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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