"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize