That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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