I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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