You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize