he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize