I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize