no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
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i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
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I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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