Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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