you didnt know i had herpes?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize