I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize