He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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