you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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