True but thats because hes a fetus.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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