found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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