great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize