my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize