why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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