Texts From Last Night

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  (815): View more from Illinois

  someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.

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  (815): someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd. http://tfl.nu/btmz
  Replies (3) Good night (610) Bad night (2044) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  dude why did you let me call her?!

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...

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  (803): dude why did you let me call her?! (1-803): i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation... http://tfl.nu/4h0w
  Replies (11) Good night (832) Bad night (2389)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed

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  (503): I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed http://tfl.nu/wtld
  Replies (55) Good night (945) Bad night (6250) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.

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  (630): I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me. http://tfl.nu/s161
  Replies (71) Good night (4094) Bad night (1702) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit

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  (925): i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit http://tfl.nu/r71a
  Replies (46) Good night (4929) Bad night (910) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.

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  (301): im trying to catch a child molester. call you later. http://tfl.nu/dlxg
  Replies (21) Good night (5160) Bad night (890) Order T-Shirt
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  (562): View more from California

  I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.

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  (562): I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day. http://tfl.nu/v32p
  Replies (10) Good night (1042) Bad night (4435) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to

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  (704): My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to http://tfl.nu/cyq1
  Replies (13) Good night (4744) Bad night (946) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..

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  (443): I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night.. http://tfl.nu/hua7
  Replies (3) Good night (1994) Bad night (883) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  oh and then you called a time out with your penis

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  (970): oh and then you called a time out with your penis http://tfl.nu/pj7g
  Replies (8) Good night (1959) Bad night (815) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV

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  (908): Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV http://tfl.nu/9om8
  Replies (5) Good night (846) Bad night (1862) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.

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  (850): HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM. http://tfl.nu/agqo
  Replies (13) Good night (577) Bad night (2170) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.

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  (425): Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now. http://tfl.nu/y7g1
  Replies (6) Good night (1272) Bad night (402) Order T-Shirt
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS

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  (785): WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS http://tfl.nu/bm5y
  Replies (5) Good night (2091) Bad night (362) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.

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  (902): I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas. http://tfl.nu/cu8d
  Replies (4) Good night (1176) Bad night (672) Order T-Shirt

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