They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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