That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
My balls are so social today.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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