Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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