She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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