I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize