we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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