Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
what day is it and did you see me today?
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize