32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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