Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize