Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize