the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
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Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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