And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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