Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
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