He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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