he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize