I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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