We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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