Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
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