Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
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This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
She made me pour olive oil on her.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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