i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Randomize