Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
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We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize