Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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