Duck Duck Cougar?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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