need another drink. this is the easiest way
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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