were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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