Betty ford says i'm here all night
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
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He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
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